If you do, then the foundations of your relationships are based in a fragile identity. You may not recognise that at the core of your problem is a sense of self that  does not feel strong inside. Instead you see the problems in your relationships as the other persons fault or, if you are single,  not finding the right person (all the good ones are taken). But relationships (or lack of them) have a way of highlighting truth. The ‘truth’ may be that  you are grieving for a past loss,  you are  unable to move on, you never observed a happy loving relationship in your childhood, or you struggle to set healthy boundaries with others. Whatever the contributing factors that underlie your relationships, the outcome is the same. The rules by which you establish your relationships are incorrectly set. As a result you are giving other people and the world around you the wrong information about what you want.

To create an intimate and  loving partnership you must understand your own needs in order to set the rules in  which healthy and loving relationships thrive.